This feels like the end...

So, parenting is one of those things where you can make all these intricate plans, thinking you've thought of every possible curveball your kiddies might throw.

But if you're already a parent, you'll know it doesn't work that way.

Plan:

Breastfeed Jacob for 1 year.

Reality:

Get to 6 months, consider stopping because he still feeds like a newborn, figure it must get better, realize it doesn't, get to 12 months and plan to stop but SB decides he likes feeding and isn't going to stop without a fight any time soon. Sigh.

Plan:

Not have to move out of my two bedroom house, because youngest can be in with me for the first 6 months/until he sleeps through then go in with his brother.

Reality

End up hating said 2 bedroom house, baby still co-sleeping 14 months later, DB sleeping on the sofa most nights so he doesn't have to share a bed with the snoring fidgeting small person, who feeds constantly through the night and refuses to take a bottle to make it a bit easier on his poor mummy.

Plan:

Slowly wean baby off of the boob one feed at a time, until he gives up by himself

Reality:

Pah! SB cries for a feed when he's tired, grumpy, bored, if I'm getting changed and he sees them, if he has a cuddle and his mouth happens to be close to them, if I'm not paying attention to him.... The list goes on. He feeds whether he's hungry or not. He constantly pulls at my top or places my hand on my chest as a sign he wants feeding. He bites, pulls me around, flips about. I wanted to give up two months ago and I'm sad our journey isn't ending nicely. I currently can only feed him off of one boob as all the biting and pulling has torn my left nipple, and every time it dies out and starts to heal I forget, feed him and it all opens up again. ouch.


SB rules the roost. I'm tired. I miss having my hubby in my bed, and not having a toddler attached to my nipple for 3/4 of the night. I'm fed up with having people tell me he shouldn't still be feeding/waking up in the night etc etc.

I'm going to try night weaning, as this is my biggest issue. wish me luck